I have very quickly come to the realisation that I need help. Now it's normal to lose your temper on occassion, and especially if it is for a valid reason. But this is just extreme. I had the same problem in my last pregnancy, and post partum.
I just can't control it. Normally I am the last person to get mad, I would describe myself as being VERY patient, and in fact to the outside world everything still seems normal... I only get mad at Sweetheart.
It will be over simple negotiations. I think one thing, he thinks something else, and I just can't handle it. For some reason it's like I am a toddler. It usually ends up with me running off mad and then ending up in tears, apologising, and generally all is forgiven.
It is very scary to have no control over my feelings, it is all so irrational. So far no punches have been thrown, but I have raised fists many a time. I do feel ashamed of myself, because I know Sweetheart's Ex-wife would hit him, and once broke a rib. How could I stoop so low?
I also feel ashamed because Darlin Boy sees this happenning and ends up in tears too. If I don't get help soon, I know I'm going to end up losing both of them...
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